Jul. 15th, 2009

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I have three kids in camp. Two are my private students. One is not. My two private students are outgoing kids. The third kid isn't. My two private students catch on to everything right away and rock everything I give them. The other hasn't spent enough time working with me to know how my mind works. So, the end result is two kids paying attention to each other and ignoring the third. This is not how I teach my kids to act. This is not the kind of teacher I want to be. Right now, all three of these kids are my students and I owe them all the same consideration and attention. Period.

Now the two are saying that the third is being mean to them. I don't see it. I see kid number three breaking into smiles during the few times when she is blocked to actually interact with the others and the rest of the time they ignore her. Is she lashing out now? Probably. If she is, it's because the other two helped create a dynamic where the third feels attacked almost all the time so what they see as "helpful" she sees as "aggressive."

Me? I am ready to fucking cry. I am ready to scrap the whole thing. I don't want to make costumes tonight.

I recognize that my two private students are far ahead of the third kid. I also recognize that they have advantages that she doesn't and I refuse to be the teacher who chooses pets. I think that teachers who do that are lazy, pathetic cop-outs who have no business "teaching" anything to anyone. I demand better from myself.

And I demand better from my students. ALL of my students.

So, tomorrow, it's as if none of this ever happened BUT if the behavior happens again, I will let 'er rip with the tantrum and the tears because they need to know JUST HOW NOT COOL THIS IS.


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Tytania Strange

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